March 1973

10. March 1973 – I AM THAT

I think it’s the only thing to do. Personally I keep repeating, “What You will, what You will, what You will… Let it be as You will, may I do as You will, may I be conscious of what You will.”

And also: “Without You, it’s death; with You, it’s life.” By “death,” I don’t mean physical death — it might happen, it might be that if I lost the contact now, it would be the end — but that’s impossible! I feel that… I AM THAT — With some resistances the present consciousness may still have, that’s all.

And when I see somebody… (Mother opens her hands as if she were offering that person to the Light), regardless of who it is: like this (same gesture).

It’s funny, I constantly feel like a little baby curled up — curled up in… (what term to use?) an all-embracing divine Consciousness.

And the slightest contradiction that enters the atmosphere causes me such discomfort, I feel I won’t be able to stand it.

There, that’s how it is.

Just now I had gone off like that, you see, but I suddenly felt uncomfortable and that pulled me back. It isn’t expressed mentally, it is neither an idea nor even a sensation, it’s… I don’t know what it is. It is like a negation, a painful negation. Which really makes me feel an acute pain, and I am pulled back into this physical consciousness.

14. March 1973 – Being Tranquil

I can’t make head or tail of these things… I can no longer be of any help, you see, because all these mental combinations don’t make any sense to me anymore.

A spirit of confusion has entered the school, I find.

They all mean the same thing, but they use different words, and the words… clash. Personally, I know they have very similar aspirations, but each one speaks in his own language, and the languages are at cross-purposes, so they quarrel over nothing. That’s the situation!

I think the best would be for everybody to keep quiet for a while.

I too never had any problems with the people around me, but now we seem to speak different languages.

But the effect on me is odd: I have the impression that I am ill — there’s nothing wrong with me, I am in good health, yet I have a constant impression of being ill.

The truth is, it’s the transition from the ordinary mental consciousness to the supramental consciousness. The mental consciousness panics in the presence of the supramental consciousness. The vibration is so different I feel one could die every minute. Only when I am very tranquil…

The old consciousness (which isn’t at all a mental consciousness, but anyway…), the old consciousness keeps repeating its mantra — there is a mantra — it keeps repeating its mantra, which makes a sort of backdrop, a contacting point. It’s very peculiar. But beyond that, there’s something full of light and force, but it’s so new that… it causes almost a panic. And if it does that to me, with the long experience I have… if it has the same effect on others, I think we’ll all end up lunatics! Well.

I think we have to remain very tranquil if we don’t want to lose the thread!

(There follows a long discussion by the teachers)

But our language is… there’s like a cloche over it, a mental cloche it doesn’t want to free itself from.

It is truly a difficult time. I think we should be very, VERY TRANQUIL — very tranquil.

(Mother turns to one of the teachers and to all the teachers)

I will tell you my old mantra. It keeps the outer being very tranquil: OM, Namo, Bhagavateh… Three words.

To me they meant:

OM: I implore the Supreme Lord.

Namo: I obey Him.

Bhagavateh: Make me divine.

This, I found, has the power to calm everything.

17. March 1973 – A Type of Consciousness

I wanted to know the difference between the trance you knew in the past and the one now?

Completely different.

So it isn’t a “trance.”

No, it’s another type of consciousness. The difference is such that I wonder… sometimes I wonder how it is possible — at times, it is so new, so unexpected it’s almost painful.

So I ask myself, “What?” And externally I see but one solution: externally — I repeat OM Namo Bhagavateh. Constantly — that’s for the outer being. And inside… (gesture, hands open in immobile contemplation)…

…an extraordinary silence. I think I’ve been in it for a few minutes, but sometimes it’s an hour… And the opposite too: I feel time drags on and on, and it’s been only a few minutes. Which means that time is different. But then, if the value of time changes… Our time is based on the sun, you see, but there, it is another reference.

It’s a new condition IN Matter.

And ruled by something other than the sun — I don’t know what… Probably the Supramental consciousness.

At mealtimes, for example, sometimes I think I have eaten very fast, and it has taken me more than an hour. Other times, I feel it took a long time — it took just a few minutes. So if you look at that from an ordinary standpoint, you feel that… people will think you’re crazy. So there’s a sort of recommendation: silence, silence, silence, silence…

The answer was immediately YES, but it wasn’t I who gave the answer.

You see how it is: now, as soon as I try to know something, I feel such a suffocating heat I think I am going to die. There. Do you understand?

19. March 1973 – No Religion

Here we have no religion.

We replace religion with spiritual life, which is truer and both deeper and higher, that is to say, closer to the Divine. For the Divine is in all things, but we are not conscious of it.

This is the immense progress that men must make.

21. March 1973 – Disturbance in the Atmosphere

And to such an extent that it makes me ill.

Yes, quite annoying it is. But there must be a radical remedy, I mean something that shelters you completely. That would be…

Personally, my solution is to curl up materially in the Divine. Only it’s difficult. It’s… It can be done, but all this (zigzagging gesture in the air) makes a constant disturbance.

24. March 1973 – About Falsehood

Look… As I understand it, when Falsehood is gone (even in a single person — when not a vestige remains…), there must be Light, Peace… (Mother stretches her arms out)… Vastness… perfect understanding… the TRUE vision of our world and things, and union, a conscious union with the divine Consciousness.

26. March 1973 – Change of Organisation of the Mind

Cohesion!… But that’s because people are accustomed to using the mind to organize things, that’s all they know: organization as devised by the mind. While we here are trying to change that pattern. We seek a change of government — but the new government isn’t very well-known yet, that’s the difficulty.

Maybe I want to go too fast.

I see clearly… I tend to go too fast, possibly.

28. March 1973 – Backdrop

I turn my consciousness towards myself as little as possible, because… the sensation is VERY unpleasant.

Things are tolerable only when I am turned exclusively towards the Divine and the material consciousness repeats, OM Namo Bhagavateh… Like that. Like a backdrop to everything.

OM Namo Bhagavateh…

You know, a backdrop you can use as a physical support.

OM Namo Bhagavateh…

30. March 1973 – Outbreak of Chickenpox and Mumps

I hope you’re not bringing any of that here?

(the teachers laugh, uncomprehending)

Have you taken all the necessary precautions?… Otherwise it would be a real catastrophe.

(silence)

I hope you took every precaution not to bring me any of it here?

If you haven’t, it’s really a crime (there is almost anguish in Mother’s voice), because…

There’s nothing to explain. It’s a crime. I am not AT ALL protected.

31. March 1973 – The New Consciousness

When I am concentrated in that way, it’s not that I am inside, I am in another kind of consciousness.

And it’s vast, vast, vast, vast — vast.

But it doesn’t have any side! It’s a consciousness (gesture of pressure from above)… It has no side, it isn’t passive or active — it’s a consciousness… (same gesture of pressure) a consciousness pressing on the world.

You see, you’re trying to translate it mentally, which is impossible — impossible. You have to enter that consciousness… then only will you know what it is. There’s no active or passive, no inside or outside — all that is replaced by something else… which I can’t describe… There are no words for it.