04. August 1962 – Receiving vibrations
(Mother listens to a passage from Satprem's manuscript concerning the vital and the mechanism by which vibrations enter one's being.)
What you say about all those things entering through the centers is perfectly correct.
Interestingly enough, these last few days I have been making a sort of detailed study of the various kinds of vibrations, how they approach you and enter the various centers.... I don't know how to explain it – certain differences between vibrations resemble differences in tastes. There's a whole gamut, you see, all vibrations, nothing but vibrations, and the differences between them resemble differences in taste or color or intensity, perhaps differences in force as well – essentially, of course, they are differences in quality.
I've been observing all this in a neuro-physical realm, subtle-physical, that is – but it's still physical – and in a complete mental silence where all judgments (you know, "judgments") have disappeared, along with a certain way of observing things. That's why I can't talk about it.
These vibrations have various qualities; if they were expressed through a mental observation, it would be done through such things as taste, color, and so forth, everything I've just mentioned – but that's not how they're expressed. They come almost exclusively as sensations, but those sensations... some, I mean some vibrations, have rounded edges. Some come horizontally (I was in fact studying everything that comes horizontally), others result from the state of consciousness (vertical gesture from top to bottom). While at the same time, others are.... Yes, it's like looking through a high-powered microscope: some are rounded, others pointed; some are darker, some brighter. Some are very upsetting to the body, and some even feel dangerous. On the other hand, certain ones make the body receptive to the vibration, which we might call "the Lord's Vibration," the supreme Vibration. You see, all this is the outcome of a discipline, a tapasya, for preparing the body to receive the Lord's Vibrations (the first step is receiving, being able to receive them; afterwards you have to hold on to and then manifest them). Those vibrations are unmistakable, they are something else entirely. But other vibrations are helpful, beneficial, while still others are disruptive, contradictory.
And each one is beginning to reveal its own particular nature. There are those stemming from people's thoughts (I sense them in my body, not in the mind: the material consequence of people's psychological state, and even their state of health). Some things are general and last a bit longer; others are momentary, lasting only a few seconds. The first step is to study the different vibrational qualities – you could practically draw diagrams: if we had a machine sensitive enough to record these things, it would produce all kinds of zigs and zags.160 Certain vibrations immediately stop or change or are dissolved or repelled. Others are adopted, as it were, and transformed. The majority are simply pushed back and worked on from a distance – quite a distance! I keep them at a fair distance (Mother laughs). Very few are let in. But some are let in for the sake of the experience, to see how much they upset the body. There's also the effect of people's permanent auras: I know a certain person is arriving by his aura's effect on the body; because (laughing) each vibration has its particular effect on the body – perfectly prosaic things, maybe, but by studying them you realize that each thing has its own law.
The interchange of vibrations among people is something tremendous, and we're swimming in it all, all, all the time – even when we're alone! Because these things travel: for instance, it's enough for someone's thought to come and strike against yours, and for you to think of him (which means responding) – there is an immediate effect in the body. So to imagine that solitude would make yoga any easier is sheer childishness.
The only possible solution is so perfect a union with the supreme Vibration that everything is automatically put under His influence; and in that case it is easier to feel wider, higher, vaster than the world (to take just the earth: the terrestrial world) than an individual. For it is easier to do this (embracing gesture), to take everything in, to embrace and change it from outside, than to change it from inside. At present, the two movements are simultaneous, and staying "inside" was the result of all those years of experience in drawing the Supreme Presence down into the most material world – for that, you have to accept (how can I put it?...) corporeal oneness.
Formerly (I mean before last April 13), the process was different; now it has totally changed. This body is nothing but a field of experience, it's no longer an individuality – not at all, at all, at all. But it's a very... willing field of experience. And the experience is going on in a particular realm by day and in another by night – it's beginning to clarify the whole subconscient. From this angle, there is a very rapid progress.
So there's a countless series of experiences coming one after the other, one after the other, like that; but there's no coordination between them, no unified "whole." I don't even know if that is possible – at any rate, it will be for much later on.
So there you are.
Millions of imperceptible notations coming one on top of another.
And through certain things, I can perceive the very clear, precise and absolute Direction coming from the Supreme. And He is arranging all those things – forms, various intellectual forms – exactly as they should be. Because here (pointing to the crown of the head), and even from here (lower) down to here (the forehead), it's all immobile.... All these vibrations come, pass through, whirl around, they come from everywhere, but here (the head) nothing moves, there's no response. And yet I have seen that on the intellectual level there are a number of... what Sri Aurobindo calls frames, certain principles of organization giving a precise orientation to the yoga's action. One of them, the strongest, is my translation of The Synthesis of Yoga. I do a page almost every day and on that page I invariably find an idea or a sentence that EXACTLY expresses the field of experiences I was in that day and the night before; and some of the details.... And interestingly enough, certain points in the pages you read me today were the EXACT "frame" of a series of experiences I've been having – almost word for word, with the same words. That sort of thing. It's like intellectual forms being assembled to give the field of experience precision, because there's nothing here (the forehead), it's blank – yet some form is necessary! Well, the forms Sri Aurobindo has given predominate, but what you write has its place, and a very precise and interesting place: the way of thinking. And I see that there's an immense field of intellectual thought, intellectual formulation, with varying degrees of intensity and precision, serving as a SIEVE for the Supreme's Will to pass through. And the sieve – this sort of immense universal sieve – is what gives the precision. It's very interesting. That way, the mind remains perfectly still – it has nothing to do, everything is done for it! It is nothing but a mirror – a living mirror where everything gets inscribed and which can reflect back its image without becoming active.
The nature of my nights is changing, the nature of my days is changing.
And then there's a first small beginning, quite small, indicating how the Power will function.
But it's... (Mother gestures into the far distance) it's merely a slight tinge.
But when it functions, things will really start moving.
08. August 1962 – Mother's discoveries
I am making some interesting discoveries. They aren't really discoveries, but nowadays none of these things are theoretical, not the least bit mental (the mind is in a quiet ease) – they're essentially practical. And they take unexpected forms.... The other day as I was walking, an old formation suddenly popped up, some. thing that had already tried to materialize when Sri Aurobindo was still here, but which he had stopped. It was one possibility among innumerable others, trying to manifest in this body's existence – I won't say what it is.
It was one of the very saddest things that could manifest physically in association with a spiritual life.
It came and tried to descend. I said absolutely nothing, but Sri Aurobindo knew (though he never mentioned anything to me, he had seen it), and he simply... (gesture) did what had to be done, brushed it aside. I hadn't thought about it for more than ten years: with that gesture of his, it had vanished.
Now it has come back.
"Well, well – why has that returned?" I wondered. And then I saw that this body has been built in such a way that it instinctively ATTRACTS ordeals, painful experiences. And in the face of such formations, it is always passive, consenting, accepting, and totally confident in the ultimate outcome, with such an ingrained certitude that even at the moment of greatest difficulty, it will be helped and saved, and that the purpose behind all those ordeals is to speed up, to gain time, and to exhaust all the... I can't say the evil possibilities, but all the hindrances – things that hamper, block the way and seem to negate the goal – so that they are pushed back into the past and no longer hinder progress.
Once I saw that, the formation went away. It had come just to show me that. And once again the body gave its eternal assent: no matter what it's burdened with, it will always be ready to receive and to bear it.
I never thought this would have any consequences, but it did!
Something probably needed to be exhausted. So physically speaking, yesterday was a pretty bad day – oh, only quite externally! In fact, the body was luminously conscious, profoundly happy and joyous, to the point where all suffering becomes negligible – you don't notice it. And so it was a real opportunity for the whole entourage to make progress. That helps.
Superficially, it [the body's characteristic of attracting ordeals] could be called a sort of karma, but that's not what it is. It's actually like one of the pivots – not a central one, but one of the pivots of the body's invisible action, of its consciousness. And it is expressed by attracting certain circumstances. A whole range of things having to do with the physical body has thus become very clear and precise to me – and that's what the body was made for: to go full speed ahead.
Intellectually, I don't at all believe in taking others' misfortunes upon oneself – that's childish. But certain vibrations in the world must be accepted, exhausted and transformed. Inwardly, that's the work I have been doing all my life – consciously, gloriously. But now it's on a purely physical level, independent of all the realities of other worlds: it's in the body, you see. And this has given me a key, one of the necessary keys to the Work.
Maybe there will be something else another time.
It has been very revealing, like a door that has opened.
And there's always that same Solicitude dosing the experience out – that's always here.
And I have noticed that now.... You see, the body used to be like a little child, complaining when things weren't right; it wouldn't revolt, but it moaned. But this time its only reaction was, "Why am I not transformed? Why am I not transformed? I want to be transformed, I want to be transformed...." Not with words, because there was nothing mental about it, but simply with a kind of tension – the tension you feel when the door to the psychic being is shut and you push, push, push to get to the other side. The same thing, the same kind of tension: pushing, pushing, pushing... towards what? I don't know. We call it "the transformation" because we don't know what it is – if we did know, it would mean we had already begun to realize it.... There's a faint impression of what that state could be (but it's very, very faint). And there's this feeling of tension, of pushing – pleading and imploring. That was the body's only reaction this time, nothing else, not even any sorrow. Because at one time – something like fifty years ago – it used to say, "Why do I deserve this?" and similar stupidities; that's been gone for more than fifty years. Then for a long while after, something disordered, unharmonious or nasty could bring me sorrow; that's gone too. But that's recent, it disappeared with the experience of April 13. And now: transformation, transformation, transformation; that's the only idea left, the only will.
For several days before that incident, something else had been coming, a kind of imaginative and creative vision of the most material physical possibilities for the future.
I've had this great formative power ever since my earliest childhood, but I had channeled it and stopped it because I considered it useless. But it came back recently, along with the sure sign that it was coming from the very highest origin: "This is it, this is how things will be." But that's for later, of course. To our external reason, those things seem totally unrealizable, but they will be realizable in... perhaps a few hundred years, I don't know – it's the future being prepared. And indeed, that vision has a tremendous power of creation and realization, and it is always felt physically (the rest is very still), it's always physical. But it triggered a kind of very rapid movement of the physical consciousness (within the most material substance), and caused a dislocation. And so the day before yesterday, that old formation suddenly returned and made me understand one aspect of the body's nature, the way the body is CONSTRUCTED and the usefulness of that construction. So now things are all right. It has been one more step.
It's not that I "receive" bad vibrations, but that the physical substance is not entirely... (how can I explain?) in the proper movement or rhythm. For instance, between the vision of that old formation I spoke of and this... (I can't call it a toothache, but anyway, something went wrong) there was no visible connection to speak of. The toothache wasn't caused by a particular vibration, it's rather... as if one thing or another provided the opportunity for absorbing a certain quantity or type of vibration (it's more a quantity than a type – probably both), a vibratory MODE, in order to put it in contact with THE vibratory mode – the divine one.
But I understand your question. You want to know if this has an effect on all identical vibratory modes in the world.... In principle, yes. But the effects may not be immediately visible; in the first place, our field of observation is nothing – materially, what do we know?... Only our immediate surroundings – that's nothing. In 1920, for example, I had an experience of that type, which resulted in a symbolic but terrestrial action. It was a vision (I don't remember enough details to make it interesting) where each nation was represented by a symbolic entity, and there was a certain type of horror – of terror, rather. A certain "will of terror" was trying to manifest in that gathering of all nations. And I was witness to the whole thing. I remember it being a very conscious and rather long and detailed vision with a more intense reality than physical things have (it was in the subtle physical). And after it was over and I had done what needed to be done (I am not saying what because I don't remember all the details, and without accuracy it loses its value), when I came out of it I could say with TOTAL conviction: "Terror has been overcome in the world." Of course, it's not literally true, plenty of people still feel terror, but a certain type of terror was as if UNDERMINED at the foundations. What had already manifested kept on and is gradually being exhausted, but the terror that was trying to increase and dominate the life of nations was stopped cold.
I have had other similar experiences – on Durga's day, for instance, when Sri Aurobindo was still here (you know, that's the day when Durga masters an Asura; she doesn't kill him, she masters him). Well, each year one particular type of thing was undermined (and my experiences were never mental: the experience would suddenly come, and AFTERWARDS I would realize it was Durga's day), and each time I used to tell Sri Aurobindo, "Look – today this (or that) thing has been cut off at the roots." That's how it works with the adverse forces – yes, like something being uprooted from the world. Whatever has already spread out keeps going and follows its karma, but the SOURCE is dried up. That's also what happened (it was in 1904, I believe) when the Asura of Consciousness and Darkness made his surrender and was converted; he told me, "I have millions and millions of emanations, and these will keep on living, but their source has now run dry." How much time will it take to exhaust it all?... We can't say, but the source has dried up and that is something extremely important. In 1920, that terror was trying to spread all over the world and to become really catastrophic; and then in my inner vision I could see that a whole movement had dried up at its source. This means that little by little, little by little, little by little... the karma is being exhausted.
The same goes for these little physical movements. Things don't seem to be "initiated" any more, I mean they're no longer being generated. But everything that's already present in the world has to be exhausted.
I can see more rapid methods, but they are essentially part of the supramental world.
To change a karma, to stop a karma, to withdraw a certain number of vibrations from circulation, as it were, requires yet another movement, another movement altogether – and that Power isn't yet at hand. That's what will yield visible, tangible results. The other movement has very tangible and concrete results, but they're invisible (to human observation, that is, which is much too limited and superficial). But it obviously does have results. That vision of terror clearly diverted the course of events that nations were being pushed into. But only someone with inner vision can see it.
14. August 1962 - The Saint in a cave
Just after speaking with you the other day, I looked closely to make absolutely sure, and I saw that even for the body – even for the body – it takes a little effort, it's an effort to feel like something separate, an individuality. It finds it constricting, as if it were shut up in a box!
The feeling is rather one of vibrations gathered together and coagulated somewhere – and even at that, there's a very supple inner play, for it spreads out like this (Mother makes a gesture of diffusion or it have any limits! It goes like this (same radiating gesture) – these same vibrations are everywhere, in all bodies and all things. What people call this body is merely the result of a willed concentration organized in a specific way; that's how it spontaneously feels, all the time (not that it's observing itself, but if something forces it to observe itself, that's what it spontaneously feels). And the delimitation that exists in all beings, and which WAS in this body (was it this body?... Haven't the cells changed?... I don't know), which once existed in what people call this body, has completely disappeared. Before (thirty years or so ago), it used to feel like something separate moving among other separate things – that's all gone.
I have tried several times, telling myself, "Ah, let's have a good look – is there anything, anywhere, that feels that separation?" (I am looking at the body from above.) "There's nothing – truly? Are you one hundred percent spontaneously sincere? Nothing at all?..." It's impossible to find a thing. Impossible.
For all the states of being, the mental, the vital, and even the subtle physical, that sense of separation has long been gone. But now I am speaking of the body. I say "I," of course – but what says "I" is... it's something as vast as the universe. And it CANNOT be otherwise. It's not that I want it this way, or because I insist on it, it's not the result of a tapasya or... not at all: it CANNOT BE OTHERWISE, that's how it is. It's my spontaneous way of being. The experience has become completely (how to put it?) externalized.
And that's what makes the ESSENTIAL difference for this body. That's why it feels different from other bodies. It's... (Mother shakes her head) no, it's not the same thing, it distinctly feels it's not the same – because its reactions are different!
Perhaps there once was a jiva.... I don't know, I don't remember; all I remember now is... ultimately, an evolving universe, with a special concentration on the affairs of the earth, because the Lord has decided that the time has come to... to change something. That's all. To change something.
There's a fellow (he's neither young nor old) who has been living for twenty-five straight years at one of the sources of the Ganges, in a small cave carved into the mountainside – a tiny, bare space, an earth floor and a tiger skin. He sits on the tiger skin stark naked, without a stitch, naked as a newborn babe, in the dead of winter as well as in summer – outside everything is covered with snow. He eats... sometimes passers-by bring him fruit, which he dries in the sun, then puts into water and drinks. That's all. He hasn't once left there in twenty-five years.
One of our children, V., a courageous boy, went up there all by himself. In winter it's completely isolated, there's nothing nearby. It was May and still frightfully cold, it seems, snow still covered the ground. And the man was sitting there stark naked as though it were perfectly natural! He even asked the boy, "Do you want to spend the night here?..." That was a bit too much!
Anyway, V. went there, sat down next to him, and after a while the man went into a sort of trance and began to tell V. about his life (the boy's life, not his own!). So V. was interested and wanted to know more. "Where do I come from?" he asked. The man answered, "Oh, from an ashram by the sea... the sea is there." Then he began to speak (I must mention that outwardly he knew nothing about Sri Aurobindo or me or the Ashram, absolutely nothing at all), and he told V. that a "great sage" and "the Mother" were there, and that they wanted to do something on earth that had never been done before – something very difficult. Then, I don't know whether he mentioned I was alone now (I have no idea), but he said, "Oh, she has had to withdraw because the people around her don't understand and... life there has become very difficult. It will be very difficult until 1964."
Perhaps he was reading the boy's mind (I don't know), but not his conscious mind. And he said several times, "They want to do something that has never been done before, it's very difficult – very difficult – and that's why they came, to do that."
I learned about this two days ago. It interested me: "Something never done before, something entirely new."
There were many other things, but it seems he speaks a particular Hindi which is very hard to understand. But this was quite clear, and he said it several times.
It interested me.
And that's really it, that's what Sri Aurobindo came for, and what I came for. And that's what was present above my head when I was quite young: something new and very difficult (Mother smiles). Very difficult.
It seems he said that if we could make it to 1964, afterwards the difficulties would disappear. (But this is a very strong formation – what did he pick up? Is it Sri Aurobindo's formation? Is it the boy's thought, or what?...) But he's a wonderful mind-reader; he must have a marvelous power of vision in the mental world.
It really amused me. If you asked... if you asked people here, not too many would have such a clear idea: "They have come to do something entirely new and very difficult."
28. August 1962 – Extreme Stubbornness is needed!
That's one thing that's happening. The two [the ordinary physical and the subtle physical] seem to be fusing more and more.
I have already explained this to you on several occasions: instead of SHIFTING from one to the other, it's as if one were permeated by the other, like this (Mother slips the fingers of her right hand in between the fingers of her left hand), and you can almost feel both simultaneously. It's one of the results of what's going on these days. A very slight concentration, for example, is all it takes to feel both at the same time, which leads me to a near conviction that true change in the physical results from a kind of PENETRATION. The most material physical substance no longer has that unreceptive sort of density, a density that resists penetration: it is becoming porous, and thus can be penetrated. Several times, in fact, I've had the experience of one vibration quite naturally changing the quality of the other – the subtle physical vibration was bringing about a sort of... almost a transformation, or in any case a noticeable change in the purely physical vibration.
That seems to be the process, or at least one of the most important processes.
And it's growing more and more prominent. I spend almost every night in that realm; and even during the day, as soon as the body is motionless, there's this perception of the two vibrations, and of the physical vibration almost becoming porous.
It seems to be the process, or certainly one important process, for the physical transformation.
You see, the subtle physical seems to DOSE OUT its power and light and capacity of consciousness according to the amount of receptivity in the purely physical vibration. That's why the effects stretch over a long period of time. It's being done very, very gradually. But it's an almost continuous work. Only when there's some bodily activity and the consciousness must turn outwards (not in the same way as before, that's impossible, but still in a way that seems like a continuation of the old consciousness), then, if the work continues at all, it's invisible – and maybe it doesn't continue.... I don't know. But as soon as all activity stops and the body is concentrated or immobile – perhaps no more than simply passive – that penetration is perceptible: it's visible. Visible. And it's not like something more subtle penetrating something less subtle without altering it; the essential point is that this penetration actually changes the composition. It's not merely a degree of subtlety, it's a change in the internal composition. Ultimately, this action probably has an effect on the atomic level. And that's how the practical possibility of transformation can be accounted for.
It's an experience I have all the time.
At times it's a bit new or a bit extreme, and you have to be careful the body doesn't panic. But then you see how everything is dosed out and maintained in a way that... (Mother laughs) nothing falls to pieces!
On the surface, it's a very humble work, nothing sensational. There are no illuminations filling you with joy and.... All that is fine for people seeking spiritual joys – it belongs to the past.
It's a very modest work, very modest, even from a purely intellectual vantage point. It's different from the sensation of knowing things because you ARE them, which gives you joy, a sense of progress. It's not even like that! It is VERY humble, a very humble and unglamorous work, but which keeps on very regularly, with extreme regularity and STUBBORNNESS.
It will surely stretch over a long period of time.
And at each step, it's as though you had to take great care that nothing gets thrown off balance. The new combinations of vibrations, especially, are difficult for the body – it must be very, very quiet, well under control, very peaceful, or else it panics. Because it's used to vibrations whose effects follow a regular pattern, so if the pattern changes there's a kind of frightened jolt. That must be avoided, the body has to be very gently kept under control.
What the mind thinks, what it expects to see, looks so childish in comparison, like... yes, like theatrics, really. It's the difference between some grand extravaganza and the very modest life of each minute. Exactly that.
All the powers, all the siddhis, all the realizations, all these things are... the grand extravaganza – the great spiritual spectacle. But this isn't like that. It's very modest, very modest, very unobtrusive, very humble, nothing showy about it. It takes years and years and years of silent, quiet and extremely careful work before there can be any visible and tangible results, before anything can be noticed, even for the [Mother's] individual consciousness.
As for those who want to go quickly, if they try going quickly in this realm, they'll be thrown off balance.
You can't go quickly.
Once, when I saw how it was, I complained a bit to the Lord: "Lord, why did you make the body this way for doing this kind of work? Just look at it!" He answered me (laughing), "It's the best that could be done." So I said "Thank you!" and kept quiet.
And that's probably true! It has some good points: what they call stubborn in English – you know (Mother plants down her two fists and holds them motionless). And stubbornness is an essentially British quality, so there's no other word for it. The body is stubborn; and that's what is needed.
31. August 1962 – How long will it take?
The more I go on, the more sober it gets. It's quiet, peaceful, with no fanfare, no make-believe, none of that.
And it's not done with the idea that, well, if you keep on this way for some time, there'll be something dazzling at the other end – not at all.
Because the other end is the new creation, so it's clear that.... How MANY steps will it take, how many incomplete or imperfect things, approximations, attempts – how many MINUSCULE realizations – for you to simply acknowledge, "Yes, indeed, we're on the way..."? For how many... oh, you could practically say centuries will it be like this before the glorious body of a supramental being appears?... Something came yesterday evening (it seemed like mere excitation to me); it was a power of creative imagination attempting to visualize supramental forms, beings that live in other worlds, and all sorts of things like that. I saw many things. But it seemed so... like champagne bubbles! "That's all very nice," I said, "for widening my power of imagination so I can present these forms to the Lord.... But it's not necessary! " (Mother laughs) It really seemed so.... There was a time when I considered it a great creative power (and many things that I saw in those moments of super-creativity, super-imagination, were actually realized years later on earth), and this time it came again (perhaps to give me a little fun, a little spectacle along the way), it came and I looked at it; I could see all its power, I could see it was something trying to materialize in the future, and I said, "What histrionics! Why go through all these theatrics?..." Jugglers.
And it was supramental light, it originated in supramental light. How beings from other worlds would relate with the future beings, and all sorts of similar things – bedtime stories.
But the vibration was there, you see, high above and all around the earth, very powerful (it was all around the earth) and very strong, it seemed to be coming from other parts of the universe and trying to enter the earth's atmosphere to help it participate in those new combinations. And it all seemed like childishness to me – the whole universe seemed to be living in childishness. There was something so tranquil here – so tranquil, so calm and unhurried, not interested in showing anything off, but capable of living in an eternity of quiet effort and progress. It was here, immobile, watching all these things.
Finally (the spectacle lasted all evening) when I lay down in bed for the night, I said to the Lord, "I don't need diversions, I don't need to see encouraging things – I only want to work calmly, quietly, IN You. You, You are the worker; You are here and You alone exist. You are the realizer." Then all grew silent, still, motionless – and the excitement waned.
So you see, there's excitement in the universe too, if you're not careful! But my impression is that it simply complicates things – it clouds the issue, you know, it complicates things. Then you have to wait for the bubbles to subside before you can calmly set off again on your way towards the goal.
Can't we hope.... You know, sometimes there are abrupt mutations in evolution....
It can be, it's possible. It's possible, I don't say it isn't; it is possible, it can happen, but... more and more, the life allotted to this body is to do things without knowing it, to change the world without seeing it, and to... to ignore all that, to be absolutely unconcerned with the results. And (to be perfectly explicit) I have a feeling that to have access to the highest and purest Power, the very notion of "result" must disappear completely – the Supreme Power has no sense of result AT ALL. The sense of result is yet another rift between the essential, supreme Power, and the consciousness. In other words, it's because the consciousness begins to separate slightly [from its identity with the Supreme Power], that the sense of result is created, but otherwise it doesn't exist.
It's as if everything had to be... to be the Action, the eternal Action at each second of the Manifestation – THE thing. At each pulsation – which corresponds to time in the Manifestation – THAT alone is THE thing. And the idea of something having a result is already a distortion.
Uninterrupted, with one link – the link of supreme Eternity. But the sense of consequences is false, it already implies a lowering of consciousness. So for me – even physically, in the midst of this whole hodgepodge of confusion, ignorance and stupidity – it all translates into: "I do things, and the results are none of my business." That's how it's expressed here in the body.
It's a kind of liberation – I don't mean from worry or preoccupation, there's no question of that – but from the very IDEA of a consequence: it's this way because that's the way it is; it has to be this way, so it is. That's all. And at each second it's this way because it has to be, and so it is. And That repeats itself eternally, and it is this eternal Pulsation which is expressed in time by those gusts – I feel this very strongly, very strongly. It's a constant, spontaneous and very natural experience for me. The idea of something behind or ahead in time and so on is... a Truth changing from immutable Eternity into Eternity of manifestation. And it changes like this (Mother makes a pulsating gesture), exactly like gusts – puff, puff, puff....
Irresponsible gusts, like a child's soap bubbles, you might say. No sense of consequences – none, none whatsoever: puff, puff, puff... like that.
It's an ever-present experience for me.
So when people come to tell me their stories, I feel like my head is being shoved into some black mush, and I can't make out anything any more. They ask my advice about what to do... (Mother laughs). So now I almost invariably answer, "Do whatever you like, it doesn't matter!" (Mother laughs.)