AGENDA 1965

November 1965


06. November 1965 – Frightfully swift movement

At night, the last two or three nights, but especially last night (in the middle of the night, after midnight), and for at least two hours, I am carried away in a movement, but a frightfully swift movement! I am lying on something which is a sort of silvery light — a silvery light. And I am lying on it, enveloped in it, and carried away in such a dizzying movement that... you feel as if your head is going to break.

It feels motionless in comparison to that Speed. It wasn't physical since my bed wasn't moving, but it was so swift, so swift that you could feel the friction of speed. And head first: it went head first. It didn't go feet first because I was lying and I didn't go feet first: I went head first, brrf I as if sucked along by something. And my eyes were open. But naturally, the body wasn't moving — visibly, at least, it wasn't moving!... Oh, I remember, yes, the night before, it was the house that was moving; I was in a room that was moving with that same swiftness, and I was watching everything hurtling and hurtling past, it was fantastic! And yesterday, it wasn't the house, it was only... a sort of column... how can I explain? It wasn't a column — a strip. I was there on that strip, but I was very tall, I took up a lot of room; there were lots of people, and they were small (Mother draws small figures), a lot, brrf!

Yes, yes, I remember, the previous night, it was the room that was moving: a square room; and there weren't any walls, there were just windows, and it was rushing and rushing, what a race it was!... Then everything stopped abruptly, finished — not finished, not stopped: the consciousness changes, there is a reversal of consciousness, so it's over.

Yes, I remember now. First a room without anything — anything — an absolute empty space; there was nothing except that strip. Oh, do you remember those moving walkways? Something like that, but instead of a walkway, it was a strip of silvery light, and it was the strip that was moving. A strip of silvery light with little sparkles. I was lying on it (quite a few people were lying on it, too), and it was zooming!...

13. August 1965 – Why the creation? Why all that?

You know, all the problems the human mind has debated and solved, anyway everything that is at the basis of religions, philosophies, yogas, and so on, the great ideas on the why and the how — ideas that are universal — all of which had been settled for a very long time... now it comes back here (Mother points to her body). It comes back with the intensity, the acuteness of something absolutely new and absolutely unknown: Why life? Why this creation? What's the meaning of it all? And with an intimate and painful knowledge of all the miseries of Matter, of all the stupidities of Matter, all the darknesses, all that — why all that? Why? And then, dissatisfied: what's the use of it all?

It's marvelous.

And the answer comes, but then with extraordinary solidity and certainty — quite extraordinary. Why the creation?... Why the creation? And the answer isn't at all sentences as in philosophies (thank God! There is nothing of all that): it's just vibrations.

And then, all of a sudden, in all this chaos, this struggle, this friction, this suffering, and this ignorance and this darkness and this effort and this and that (oh, it's much worse than when it takes place in the mind: it's here [in the body] and it's a question, yes, of life and death in the true sense of the phrase, that is to say, of existence or nonexistence, of consciousness or total unconsciousness... and then how much it costs to find out anything B.G.), and then, all of a sudden, just one drop. ), it's not even a flash of lightning, it's... yes, it's a vibration, a DIFFERENT vibration — luminous, so wonderfully sweet, peaceful, powerful, absolute. It's like something lighting up (gesture like a burst of light or a luminous pulsation). And then there's no need anymore of discussion or explanation or anything: you've understood — it's to become conscious of THAT, it's to live THAT.

It happened this morning.

It began yesterday and has been developing.

...Oh, how poor explanations are — poor, incomplete, without the power to convince. But just THAT, one vibration of THAT, and then you understand everything.

And I have an impression, a very strong impression (I don't have any proof yet) that its contagion is absolute, you understand. So having to explain, having to struggle, having to... oof! it's all over — it's contagious.

Bringing that and keeping it. Holding it, learning to hold it. It's fantastic! And then it becomes just a question of receptivity, that's all. And the receptivity must be in proportion to the goodwill (that's what the old experience is saying for the moment, I have no proof), the receptivity must be in proportion to the goodwill or to the aspiration (but the two are very similar), to this something that wants something else. People who are very content, very satisfied and... (this is an interesting illustration) and who have realized a harmony in life (some people have realized a harmony in this life: everything appears so harmonious, so comfortable, they succeed in everything they do, everything that happens to them is...), I think those still have a long way to go before they can receive.

That vibration has nothing, but nothing to do with that whole path, that long, long, long path one has walked to prepare oneself, and with such blows, oh!... THAT (gesture like a burst of light), and all the rest no longer matters.

But it isn't mental. For the time being, it has nothing to do with thought.

15. November 1965 – Sleeping well!

You must sleep well. Yes, I have noticed that it's important to sleep a long time. As soon as you feel tired, let yourself drift into sleep, don't resist. That's important. I am saying this from personal experience, because all of a sudden... When there is a length of time (it lasts an hour, two hours, it depends) during which the atmosphere is all vibrant with this light-force-joy I spoke of the other day, and you are as if... it's absolutely full, absolutely full; and then all of a sudden (gesture of inward plunge), and after a time you ask yourself, "Well, well, where have I been?..." There are times like that when you go into a sort of sleep. The first few times, I thought I had lapsed into unconsciousness (although that has rarely happened to me!), but anyway, I wondered what it meant. Then I took a good look and I saw it was a necessary period of assimilation. It's very necessary. It's in a sort of stillness of the cells' consciousness that they assimilate the new force. So when it comes, don't resist. Generally, it doesn't last very long: fifteen minutes, twenty minutes. A period of assimilation. You know, the atmosphere is charged, charged, increasingly charged. So if suddenly you feel something pulling, don't resist, let yourself go — it's better not to be standing up!

20. November 1965 – About Kennedy's death

Oh, Catholic!...

Ah, that's why he died.... You know he was truly in favor of freedom, and not only freedom but union. And he was receptive. You know how he worked for the Blacks there (moreover, that's the external cause of his death). But he was the one I counted on, not without reason, as he had shown signs of assent to a union with Russia to establish peace on earth. Talks had already started and they had seized the opportunity of China's aggression against India. Naturally, that wasn't quite to the extremists' liking, and in the atmosphere, the force which for centuries has acted behind the Catholic religion wasn't at all in favor of that plan; so things "worked out" well and they killed him. The other one in Russia who had responded, Khrushchev, didn't die because he left in time!

But I didn't know, I thought Kennedy was Protestant.

23. November 1965 – We must be patient

Regarding the message Mother will give for the November 24 darshan:

"It is certainly a mistake to bring down the light by force — to pull it down. The Supramental cannot be taken by storm. When the time is ready it will open of itself — but first there is a great deal to be done and that must be done patiently and without haste."

Sri Aurobindo

That's good for sensible people. They will say, "There, he doesn't promise any miracles."

People are in a hurry, they want to see results right away.

So then, they think they are pulling the Supramental down — and they pull some little vital entity that leads them on and afterwards plays nasty tricks on them. That's what happens most often, ninety-nine times out of a hundred.

A little individuality, a vital entity that puts on a big show and creates dramatic effects, lighting effects; so the poor devil who has pulled is bedazzled, he says, "Here's the Supramental!" and he falls into a hole.

It's only when you have touched, seen somehow or other, and had a contact with the true Light that you can discern the Vital, and you realize that it's absolutely like lighting effects on a theater stage: theatrical effects, an artificial light. But otherwise people are bedazzled — it's dazzling, it's "magnificent," and so they are misled. It's only when you have SEEN and had a contact with the Truth... "Ah!" then it makes you smile.

It's showing off, but you have to know the truth in order to discern the showing off.

Basically, it's the same for everything. The Vital is a sort of super-theater giving performances — very alluring, dazzling, deceptive performances — and it's only when you know the True Thing that immediately, instinctively, without reasoning, you discern and say, "No, I don't want that."

And for everything, you know. The one point in human life where it has assumed cardinal importance is love. Vital passions and attractions have almost in every case taken the place of the true feeling, which is tranquil, while that makes you bubble with excitement, it gives you the feeling of something "living".... It's very deceptive. And you can know this, feel it, perceive it clearly only when you know the True Thing; if you have touched true love through the psychic and through divine union, then it [vital love] appears hollow, thin, empty: an appearance and a drama — more often a tragedy than a comedy.

All that you can say about it, all that you can explain about it is perfectly useless, because the one who has been caught will instantly say, "Oh, it's not like with others" — what happens to you is never like what happens to others (!) What's needed is the "Thing," the true experience... then the whole Vital is seen as a masquerade — not an alluring one.

And when people pull down, oh, it's much more than ninety-nine times out of a hundred — it's one case in a million in which the True Thing happens to be pulled down; which proves the person was ready. Otherwise, what's pulled down is always the Vital: the appearance, the dramatic representation of the Thing, not the Thing itself.

Pulling down is always an egoistic movement. It's a distortion of aspiration. True aspiration involves a giving — a self-giving — while pulling down is wanting for oneself. Even if you have in your thought a vaster aspiration — the earth, the universe — it makes no difference, those are mental activities.

(long silence)

When things are put mentally, all those who have tried to explain things mentally have made an opposition, and so people imagine that one is the very opposite of the other [the True Thing and its distortion]; in that case it would be so easy to discern. But that's not at all how it is!... I am now studying the way in which Matter, the body, can be in constant harmony with the divine Presence. And it's so interesting: it's not at all an opposition, it's a tiny little microscopic distortion. For instance, there is this frequent experience (and generally people don't know why it is so — now I know): on some days or at certain times all the gestures you make are harmonious, all the things you touch seem to respond harmoniously to the will that touches them, everything works out (I am talking about the very small things of life — of everyday life), each thing seems to be in its place or to find its place naturally: if you fold a paper, it folds itself as though spontaneously, as it should; if you look for something, you seem to spontaneously find the thing you need; you never knock against anything, never upset anything — everything seems harmonious. And then, without any appreciable difference in the overall state of consciousness, at other times, it's the exact opposite: if you want to fold a paper, you fold it the wrong way; if you want to touch some object, you drop it — everything seems disharmonized or off balance or bad-willed. You are yourself more or less in the same state. But now, with the present keen and fine observation, I see that in one case, there is a sort of inner silence in the cells, a PROFOUND quietude, which doesn't prevent movement, even rapid movement, but the movement seems to be founded on an eternal vibration; and in the other case, there is that inner precipitation (gesture of tremor), that inner vibration, that inner restlessness, that haste to go from one moment to the next, that constant hurry (why? There's no knowing why), always, always hurrying and scurrying; and everything you do is wrong. And in the other case, with that inner serenity and peace, everything is done harmoniously, and MUCH FASTER in material time: there is no time lost.

And that's why it's so difficult to know how one should be. Because in thought you can be in the same constant state, even in aspiration you can be in the same constant state, in the general goodwill, even in surrender to the Divine, it all can be the same thing, in the same state — it's in here (Mother touches her body), and this makes the whole difference. I can very well conceive that there may be people in whom this opposition persists in the mind and the vital, but there it's so obvious.... But I am talking of something absolutely material. Some people say and think, "How come? I have such goodwill, such a desire to do the right thing, and then nothing works, everything jars — why? I am so good (!) and yet things don't respond." Or those who say, "Oh, I have made my surrender, I have such goodwill, I have an aspiration, I want nothing but the Truth and the Good, and yet I am ill all the time — why am I ill?" And naturally, one small step more, and you begin to doubt the Justice that rules the world, and so on. Then you fall into a hole.... But that's not it, that's not what I mean. It's much simpler and much more difficult at the same time, because it isn't blatant, it isn't evident, it's not an opposition from which you can choose, it's... truly, totally and integrally leaving the entire responsibility to the Lord.

Of all things, this is the most difficult for man — it's far easier for the plant and even for the animal, far easier. But for man it's very difficult. Because there was a whole period in the evolution when in order to progress he had to take on the responsibility for himself. So the habit has formed, it has taken root in the being.

I have noticed something very interesting. Suppose there is a pain, some sign or other that something in the body is out of order. In the consciousness — in the consciousness — you are absolutely indifferent, which means that whether it's life or death, disease or health, there is equality; but if the body reacts according to its old habit, "What should be done to get over it?" and all that it involves (I am not speaking of a reaction in the mind, but here, in the body), the thing takes root. Why? Because it has to stay there... (laughing) to enable you to study it! If, on the other hand, the cells have learned their lesson and say right away, "Lord, Your presence" (without words — the attitude), pfft! the thing goes.

It's no use if the thought does it, if the psychic consciousness, EVEN THE PHYSICAL CONSCIOUSNESS, does it: it must be the cells that do it. So the one who does it in the thought says, "Here, I give myself to the Divine, I am ready for anything, I am in a state of perfect equality, and still I am ill! So what am I to believe?" That's not the point. In order to have an instantaneous action HERE ("instantaneous," meaning what looks like a miracle, which isn't a miracle at all), there should instantaneously be, wherever a disorder has occurred for some reason or other, this: "Lord — Lord, this is You; Lord, we are You; Lord, You are here" — everything flies away. A sensation, an attitude — instantaneously, hup! it's over.

I have had hundreds upon hundreds of experiences like that.

And the state — the general state of the consciousness — is exactly the same, always like this (immobile gesture, palms offered to the Heights), in a sort of conscious bliss of: "Let Your Will be done." But that's no use, it doesn't act HERE — it must happen HERE (Mother touches her body).

It's very interesting.

I could talk for hours, but it's no use.

I know so well it's no use that when what I said is read back to me... I said it while I was IN the experience, but when I read it again, I am in another experience, so I find it quite lacking in power of conviction. If by chance I can recapture the experience, I immediately feel, "Well, yes, that's exactly it." Therefore, unless one has the experience, reading is no use. We still publish the Bulletin, but anyway the truth is like that. It's only at the time of having the experience that you can really understand what you read.

It may have the power to convey the experience (mentally that's indisputable: it has a mental effect), but what I am talking about is the work here, in the cells of the body.... You give yourself a nice little mental explanation, but that's not it! While when you have had the vibration, ah, it's obvious.

You know, you are in considerable discomfort, out of sorts, unable to breathe, you have a feeling of nausea, of helplessness, you can't even move, or think or do anything... in a word, quite out of sorts; and then suddenly... the Consciousness — the bodily consciousness of the Vibration of Love, which is the very essence of the creation, just one second: everything lights up, pfft! gone, it's all gone. Then you look at yourself, amazed — it's all gone. You were in considerable discomfort — it's all gone.

Well, I don't think words can convey this. It's not even a question of living in the atmosphere — what is it?... Maybe one day it will be a power. The power to pass this on. Then it will be possible for everything to change.

Probably when it's there, permanently established.

When it must be, it will be, no?

27. November 1965 – Living in this New Consciousness

Sri Aurobindo was there from morning to evening.

THERE, you know.

For, oh, for more than an hour, he made me live the concrete and living vision, as it were, of the condition of humanity and the various layers of humanity in relation to the new or supramental creation. And it was marvelously clear and concrete and living.

There was the whole humanity that isn't quite animal anymore, that has benefited from mental development and created a certain harmony in its life — a vital, artistic, literary harmony — and the vast majority of which live satisfied with life. They have caught a sort of harmony and live in it a life as it exists in a civilized milieu, that is to say, somewhat cultured, with refinement in taste, refinement in habits. And this whole life has a sort of harmony in which they find themselves at ease, and unless something catastrophic happens to them, they live happy and content, satisfied with life. Those may be attracted (because they have taste, they are intellectually developed), they may be attracted to the new forces, the new things, the future life; for instance, they may mentally, intellectually become disciples of Sri Aurobindo. But they don't at all feel the need to change materially, and if they were to be forced to, it would be first of all premature and unjust, and it would quite simply create a great disorder and would upset their lives quite unnecessarily.

It was very clear.

Then there were the few — the rare individuals — who are ready to make the necessary effort to prepare themselves for the transformation and to attract the new forces, try to adapt Matter, seek the means of expression and so forth. Those are ready for Sri Aurobindo's yoga. They are very few. There are even those who have the sense of sacrifice and are ready to have a hard and difficult life, as long as it leads them or helps them towards this future transformation. But they should not, they should in no way try to influence others and make them share their own effort: that would be quite unjust — not only unjust, but extremely clumsy because it would alter the universal — or at least terrestrial — rhythm and movement, and instead of helping, it would cause conflicts and result in chaos.

But it was so living, so real, that my whole attitude (how can I explain?... A passive attitude, which isn't the result of an active will), the whole position taken in the work has changed. And this has brought a peace — an absolutely decisive peace and tranquillity and trust. A decisive change. And even, all that in the previous position seemed to be obstinacy, clumsiness, unconsciousness, all sorts of deplorable things, all that has disappeared. It was like a vision of a great universal Rhythm in which each thing takes its own place and... everything is just fine. And the effort of transformation limited to a small number becomes something FAR MORE precious and FAR MORE powerful for the realization. It's as if a choice had been made of those who will be the pioneers of the new creation. And all those ideas of "spreading" [the ideal], of "preparing" or churning Matter—childishness. It's human agitation.

The vision had such majestic and calm and smiling beauty, oh!... It was full, really full of divine Love. And not a divine Love that "forgives" — that's not at all the point, not at all! — each thing in its own place, realizing its inner rhythm as perfectly as it can. That's all.

That was a very beautiful gift.

Of course, all those things are known somewhere, intellectually, vaguely, in their principle — all that is known, but it's quite use­less. In everyday practice, you live according to something else, a truer understanding. And there, you seemed to be touching things — you saw them, touched them — in their higher ordinance.

It came after a vision of plants and the spontaneous beauty of plants (which is something so wonderful!), then of the animal with such a harmonious life (when men don't interfere), and all that was quite in its own place. Then true humanity seen as such, that is to say, the summit of what a balanced mind can produce in beauty, in harmony, in charm, in elegance in life, in taste for life — taste to live in beauty — while eliminating, naturally, all that is ugly and low and vulgar. That was a lovely humanity. Humanity at its highest, but lovely. And perfectly satisfied as such, because it lives harmoniously. And it may also be like a promise of what almost the totality of humanity will become under the influence of the new creation: as I saw it, it was what the supramental consciousness can do with humanity. There was even a comparison with what humanity has done with animal kind (something extremely mixed, of course, but there have been improvements, betterments, more complete utilizations). Animality under the mental influence has become something else, which naturally has been mixed because the mind is incomplete; similarly there are examples of a harmonious humanity among the well-balanced people, and it appeared to be what humanity could become under the supramental influence.

Only, it's very far ahead; we shouldn't expect it to come about immediately — it's very far ahead.

There is clearly, even now, a transitional period, which may last a rather long time and is rather painful. But the sometimes painful effort (often painful) is made up for by a clear vision of the goal to be reached, of the goal that WILL be reached — an assurance, you know, a certitude. But it would be something that had the power to eliminate all the errors, all the distortions and ugliness of mental life, and then a very happy humanity, quite satisfied with being human, feeling no need whatsoever to be anything but human, but with a human beauty, a human harmony.

It was very charming, it was as though I were living in it. Contradictions had disappeared. As though I lived in that perfection. And it was almost like the ideal conceived by the supramental consciousness of a humanity that had become as perfect as it can be. It was very good.

And it brings a great sense of rest. Tension, friction, all that disappears — impatience, too. All that had completely disappeared.

In other words, you're concentrating the work instead of diffusing it everywhere?

No, it may be materially diffused because the individuals aren't necessarily gathered together. But there aren't many of them.

That idea of an urgent need to "prepare" humanity for the new creation, that impatience has disappeared.

Take for instance a book like yours (but I've known this from the beginning), a book of that sort will have fulfilled its full purpose if it touches just a dozen people. It doesn't need to sell by the thousands. If it touches a dozen people, it will have fulfilled its purpose to the full. That's how it is.

I saw that, I have seen that so concretely. Besides those who are capable of preparing for the supramental transformation and the realization, whose number is necessarily very limited, there should be increasingly developed, in the midst of the ordinary human mass, a higher humanity that had towards the future or promised supramental being the same attitude as animality, for instance, has towards man. What is needed, besides those who work for the transformation and are ready for it, is a higher or intermediate humanity that would have found in itself or in life this harmony with life — this HUMAN harmony — and that would have the same sense of worship, of devotion, of faithful dedication to "something" that seems to it so superior that it doesn't even attempt to realize it, but which it worships and whose influence and protection it feels the need of — and the need to live in that influence and to have the joy of being under that protection.... It was so clear. But not that anguish and agony of wanting something that eludes you because — because it isn't yet your destiny to have it, and because the amount of necessary transformation is premature for your existence, and so it creates a disorder and a suffering.

But I clearly see that when the work is done as I am "made" to do it, it becomes that way very spontaneously. For instance, one of the very concrete things, which shows the problem clearly: humanity has the sex impulse quite naturally, spontaneously and, I may say, legitimately. This impulse will naturally and spontaneously disappear along with animality (a lot of other things will disappear, such as for instance the need to eat, perhaps also the need to sleep the way we do), but the most conscious impulse in a higher humanity, and which has remained as a source of... bliss is a big word, but of joy, of delight, is certainly the sexual activity, which will have absolutely no more reason to exist in the functions of nature when the need to create in that way no longer exists. Therefore the capacity to come into contact with the joy in life will go up one rung or will orient itself differently. But what the spiritual aspirants of old had attempted on principle — sexual negation — is an absurd thing, because it must exist only in those who have gone beyond that stage and no longer have any animality in them. And it must fall off naturally, effortlessly, without struggle, just like that. Making it a focus of conflict, struggle and effort is ridiculous. To be sure, my experience with the Ashram has absolutely proved that to me, because I have seen all the stages and that all the ideas and prohibitions are absolutely useless, that it's only when the consciousness stops being human that it falls off quite naturally. There is a transition there that may be somewhat difficult because transitional beings are always in a precarious balance, but inside oneself there is a sort of flame or need thanks to which the transition isn't painful — it's not a painful effort, it's something that can be done with a smile. But to want to impose that on those who aren't ready for that transition is absurd. I have been much reproached for encouraging certain people to marry; there are lots of these children to whom I say, "Get married, get married!" I am told, "What! You encourage them?" — it's common sense.

It's common sense. They are human, but let them not pretend they aren't.

It's only when the impulse spontaneously becomes impossible for you, when you feel it as something painful and contrary to your deeper need, then it becomes easy; at that time, well, outwardly you cut the links, then it's over.

This is one of the most convincing examples.

It's the same thing with food — it will be the same thing. And there will probably be a transition in which our food will be less and less purely material. That's what they are after nowadays: all their vitamins and tablets are an instinctive research for a less down-to-earth food, which certainly will serve as a transition.

There are lots of things like that. Since the 24th [the darshan day] I have been living in this new consciousness and have seen the picture of a lot of things. There are even experiences I had gone through which I've understood now. Like for instance when I fasted for ten days (completely, without even a drop of water), without a thought for food (I didn't have time to eat), and it wasn't a struggle: it was a decision. And at that time there was a faculty in me which developed little by little, and when for example I breathed in flowers, it was nourishing. I saw it: you get nourished in a subtler way.

Only, the body isn't ready. The body isn't ready and it deteriorates, which means that it eats itself up. So that shows that the time hadn't come and it was just an experiment — an experiment which teaches you something, which teaches you that there mustn't be a blunt refusal to come in contact with the corresponding matter, there mustn't be isolation (you can't isolate yourself, that's impossible), but a communion on a higher or deeper level.

(silence)

The message we distributed on the 24th, it was Sri Aurobindo who had told me to keep it for the 24th, that was very clear and very categorical, but I didn't know why. But now he has clearly shown me why and I've well understood. Because this Power is becoming more and more obvious — this Truth-Power — and naturally human thought, which is childish (it has the same attitude towards supramental thought as what we may call animal thought or sentiment has towards human thought or sentiment), has almost a need for superstition ("superstition" is an ugly word for something that's not ugly: it's an ignorant, ingenuous and very trusting faith), and, well, as soon as you feel the influence of a Power, that faith makes you believe in the miracle, it makes you believe that the Supramental is going to manifest now, that you are going to become supramental, and that... And quite amusingly, I usually have to send out two to three hundred of these "messages" every darshan (everyone asks me for some for his correspondents); and this time, I haven't even given a hundred of them! (Laughing) Not even a hundred. Ah, it's not so comfortable, of course, it comes and tells you, "No, no, be sensible."

It's very amusing. I still have my whole stack here.

It's like telling a dog, "Don't think, don't believe at all I am as you imagine, all-powerful and all-knowing." If the dog were told the truth of how we humans are, the poor thing would be quite disappointed! It believes you are the all-powerful being, knowing everything and capable of doing everything. Well, that's the same thing, you don't tell a dog, "You're superstitious."

(silence)

Those who have touched the higher regions of intelligence but haven't mastered in themselves the mental faculties have an ingenuous need for everyone to think as they do and to be able to understand as they understand, and when they realize that others cannot, don't understand, their first reflex is to be horribly shocked; they say, "What a fool!" But "fool" isn't the point at all — they are different, they live in another region. You don't go and tell an animal, "You're a fool," you say, "It's an animal." Well, you say, "It's a man." It's a man. Only, there are those who aren't men anymore and aren't gods yet, and those are in a very... in English they say, a very awkward position.

But it was so soothing, so sweet, so marvelous, that vision — each thing expressing its own kind, quite naturally.

And then, the Flame... When the Flame lights up, everything becomes different. But this Flame is something totally different; it's totally different from religious feeling, religious aspiration, religious worship (all that is very fine, it's the summit of what man can do and it's very fine, it's excellent for humanity), but this Flame, the Flame of transformation, is something else. Oh, I remember now that Sri Aurobindo reminded me of something I had written in Japan (which is printed in Prayers and Meditations), and I had never understood what I had written. I always tried to understand and asked myself, "What the devil did I mean? I have no idea." It had come like that and I had written it directly. It was about a "child" and it read, "Do not come too near him because you will get burnt." (I don't remember the words at all.) And I always wondered, "What's this child I am referring to?... And why should one take care not to come too near him??" (Prayers and Meditations, March 27, 1917: "...You see it in your own heart, this triumphant hearth; you alone can bear it without its being destructive. If others touched it, they would be consumed. Do not therefore let them come too near it. The child must know that he must not touch the bright flame that attracts him so much....") And suddenly, only yesterday or the day before, I understood; suddenly he showed me, he told me, "It's this: the 'child' is the beginning of the new creation, it is still in its infancy," so don't touch it if you don't want to be burnt — because it burns.

(silence)

And it's quite clear that with the breadth and totality of the vision something comes which is a compassion that understands—not that pity of the superior for the inferior: the true divine Compassion, which is the total understanding that everyone is what he must be.

There remain only distortions. There was also the explanation of distortions. It was a decisive vision that puts everything in its place. A true revelation.

All those things have been told a thousand times, they have been written I don't know how many times, they have been thought and expressed—all that is very fine, up there. But this is seen on the material plane itself, felt, lived, breathed, absorbed; it's something else altogether. It's an understanding that has nothing to do with intellectual understanding.

(after a long silence)

Sri Aurobindo continues to tell me things.... It's truly very interesting.

There is a sort of instinct which wants everything to be in agreement with the experience one has. But that is a tendency to uniformity, the Supreme's uniform oneness, which is the non-manifest Supreme, eternally unchanging, in opposition to the innumerable multiplicity of all the expressions of that Oneness; and instinctively there is always a recoil (gesture) towards the Non-manifest, instead of (Mother opens her two hands) an acceptance of the manifestation in its totality. It's very interesting.

And it's the first effect of the return to the Origin.

The first effect of the return to the origin is simplification, identity, the One — the identical One. And then there is the movement of the manifestation (gesture of expansion): the multiple Immensity.

It's instinctive.

30. November 1965 – Savitri B10C4

Imagining meanings in life's heavy drift,

They trusted in the uncertain environment

And waited for death to change their spirit's scene.

(X.IV.641)

Yes, those are the people who are hoping to go to a beatific heaven.

The entire West is convinced, of course, that the earth has to be taken as it is and that it's a preparation for a life in another world, which according to your "faults" or "qualities" will be a heaven or a hell. But anyway, doing away with hell, all those who have goodwill will go to a beatific heaven.

It's a weird invention, isn't it!

Anyway...

But there is an accumulation, an extraordinary compactness of knowledge in this whole Savitri, at every turn. There is nothing that's void of knowledge. It's truly interesting.