April 1973 |
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07. April 1973 – The World’s Resistances I seem to be gathering all the world’s resistances… They come to me one after another, and if I weren’t… If I stop calling the Divine for a single minute, intimately feeling his presence within me, the pain is unbearable! To such a point that I now hesitate to speak of “transformation” to people, because if that’s what it is, one really has to be a hero… You see, there’s something in the body that would almost howl nonstop. Yet it looks to me that there is something VERY simple to be done to make it all right… But I don’t know what. Sometimes I wonder, “Does the Lord want me to leave?” I am quite… quite willing, you know, so that’s not the point; but does He want me to stay?… No answer. No answer except “Transformation.” And that is… I truly, truly sense there is something to be done that would make everything go right — but I don’t know what it is. You see, I have a solution for the transformation of the body, but… it’s never been done before, so it’s extremely… hard to believe. I cannot, I cannot believe that that’s it. Yet, it’s the only solution I see… The body has a wish to go to sleep and awake… (“sleep” in a certain sense, of course: I remain perfectly conscious in consciousness, in the movement) and awake only after it is transformed… You see, I have a solution for the transformation of the body, but… it’s never been done before, so it’s extremely… hard to believe. I cannot, I cannot believe that that’s it. Yet, it’s the only solution I see… The body has a wish to go to sleep and awake… (“sleep” in a certain sense, of course: I remain perfectly conscious in consciousness, in the movement) and awake only after it is transformed… …but people will never have the patience to stand it, to take care of me. The task is colossal, a herculean task; they’re nice (Mother points to the bathroom), but they’re already doing their utmost, and I can’t ask for more. That’s the problem. Yet, it’s the only solution to which the consciousness assents: “Yes, that’s it.” For, you see… there’s a certain state — yes, a state like this (Mother closes a fist), sell-absorbed, in which you are… at peace. But who? Who? To ask that of the people who take care of me is almost impossible. |
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10. April 1973 – False Statement Pranab declares to P.B., one of the Ashram‘s trustees, “Get ready for Mother’s departure.” P.B. asks Satprem through someone, what it means. |
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11. April 1973 – Message Beyond man’s consciousness Beyond speech O thee, Supreme Consciousness Unique Reality Divine Truth… |
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14. April 1973 – Mother’s Nervous System My nervous system is being transferred to the Supramental. It feels like… you know, what people call “neurasthenia” — they have no idea what it is; but the entire nervous system is… It’s worse than dying. But I think… I think I can transmit the divine Vibration. But I know it’s my body… this body… Look, I have accepted — the Lord asked me if I wanted to undergo the transformation, and I said yes (I would have said yes in any event), but it’s… to the ordinary human consciousness, I am going mad. |
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25. April 1973 – The Body is frightened Something… It isn’t really painful, it’s just… I think — I think it’s something so new that the body is frightened. That’s the only explanation I see. I start howling, but… it’s no use — the only thing to do is stop howling and change. Something which… Yes, that must be it: something so new that the body… doesn’t know how to take it. You don’t perceive anything in particular? That must be why! Yes, the body must be getting alarmed. Yes, that must be it. |
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